(with tongue near cheek)

Dear:

[x] clueless newbie  [ ] lamer  [ ] AOLer
[ ] "me too"-er   [ ] pervert  [x] geek/geekette
[ ] spammer  [ ]  nerd  [ ] pre-teen
[ ] lazy sales type  [ ] scammer  [ ] all of the above

You are being flamed because you posted to the ENTIRE TechNet list:

[ ] when a single e-mail message would have done the job perfectly
[ ] using some Microsoft or otherwise crappy/buggy software
[x] managing to defeat the fool-proof accidental posting prevention mechanism
[ ] asking to subscribe/unsubscribe when every single posting tells you how
to do so
[ ] using excessive arcane acronyms
[ ] with an elaborate and self-aggrandizing signature line
[ ] using wasteful and annoying HTML code
[ ] an open-ended question giving no background details
[ ] a ridiculous vincard attachment to the entire mailing list
[ ] a thinly veiled advertisement for your consulting service
[ ] quoting an ENTIRE post in your reply
[ ] continuing a long, stupid thread
[ ] an off-topic thread having nothing to do with this mailing list
[ ] a rude comment about one of the good old boys here
[ ] a blatently obvious troll
[ ] a request for somebody to do your homework
[ ] a request for somebody to do your job
[ ] demonstrating don't want to learn to fish, just want some free fish
[ ] requesting a quick free technology transfer to the third (or higher) world
[ ] indicating whatever you wanted, you wanted ASAP
[ ] and you are too stupid to do an obvious web search
[ ] and pretended to be a guru (clearly you aren't)
[ ] pretending to be/work for someone/some famous company (See "troll" above)
[ ] replying to the above message type believing it was someone famous
[ ] flaming a pitiable person in distress trying to find some help
[ ] saying "me too" to something
[ ] saying "send me a copy too"
[x] the stupidest article of the week
[ ] a stupid pyramid money-making scheme and claimed it was legal
[ ] a ridiculous warning of some silly new computer virus
[x] wasting bandwidth without any useful purpose
[ ] WITH ALL YOUR ARTICLE IN CAPITALS

To repent, you must:

[ ] Give up your AOL account
[ ] Find some real work
[ ] Attend a whole year's SMTA meetings, paying dues in advance
[ ] Read current issues of SMT, Circuits Assembly, and EP&P, post a
synopsis to the list
[ ] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor
[x] Actually post something useful
[ ] visit a library, read a book on the subject of modern electronics
[ ] Read everything Howard Manko ever wrote
[ ] Have a face to face counseling session with Hugo Scaramuzza
[ ] Read the FAQ
[ ] Write the FAQ

In closing, I'd like to say:

[x] Don't do it ever again, please
[x] You may be better suited to the mail list for "jokes of the day"
[ ] Do it again and we'll report you to the postmaster of your domain
[ ] Do it again and we'll see you get 10 copies of each TechNet posting for
a month
[ ] Never post to TechNet again
[ ] Age two more years before you post again
[ ] "Solder off"
[ ] Learn to post or solder off
[ ] All of the above

Jerry Cupples
Interphase Corporation
Dallas, TX USA
http://www.iphase.com

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