Passing on some more humor.....Have a great day
Rick

> Science Humor
> -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
>
> The following are all quotes from 11 year olds' science exams:
>
> "When you breath, you inspire. When you do not
> breath, you expire."
>
> "H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water"
>
> "To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a
> flame in a test tube"
>
> "When you smell an oderless gas, it is probably
> carbon monoxide"
>
> "Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not
> found in a free state"
>
> "Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and
> Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and
> water."
>
> "Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and
> caterpillars."
>
> "Blood flows down one leg and up the other."
>
> "Respiration is composed of two acts, first
> inspiration, and then expectoration."
>
> "The moon is a planet just like the earth, only it is
> even deader."
>
> "Artifical insemination is when the farmer does it
> to the cow instead of the bull."
>
> "Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines
> down on them and makes them perspire."
>
> "A super-saturated solution is one that holds more
> than it can hold."
>
> "Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so
> they look like umbrellas."
>
> "The body consists of three parts- the brainium, the
> borax and the abominable cavity. The brainium
> contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and
> lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the
> bowls, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u."
>
> "The pistol of a flower is its only protection against
> insects."
>
> "The alimentary canal is located in the northern
> part of Indiana."
>
> "The skeleton is what is left after the insides have
> been taken out and the outsides have ben taken off.
> The purpose of the skeleton is something to hitch
> meat to."
>
> "A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines,
> eight cuspids, two molars, and eight cuspidors."
>
> "The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon.
> All water tends towards the moon, because there is
> no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum.
> I forget where the sun joins in this fight."
>
> "A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the
> more extinct it is."
>
> "Many women belive that an alcoholic binge will
> have no ill effects on the unborn fetus, but that is a
> large misconception."
>
> "Equator: A managerie lion running around the
> Earth through Africa."
>
> "Germinate: To become a naturalized German."
>
> "Liter: A nest of young puppies."
>
> "Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a
> dead cat."
>
> "Momentum: What you give a person when they
> are going away."
>
> "Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky."
>
> "Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot."
>
> "Vacumm: A large, empty space where the pope
> lives."
>
> "Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the
> blood is affirmative or negative."
>
> "To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down
> over the nose."
>
> "For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower then the
> body until the heart stops."
>
> "For drowning: Climb on top of the person and
> move up and down to make artifical perspiration."
>
> "For fainting: Rub the person's chest or, if a lady,
> rub her arm above the hand instead. Or put the head
> between the knees of the nearest medical doctor."
>
> "For dog bite: put the dog away for sevral days. If
> he has not recovered, then kill it."
>
> "For asphyxiation: Apply artificial respiration until
> the patient is dead."
>
> "To prevent contraception: wear a condominium."
>
> "For head cold: use an agonizer to spray the nose
> untill it drops in your throat."
>
> "To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the
> cow."

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