It also lets me know why we have "Happy Cows" in California they don't need to eat aluminum! But based on our state-wide education test scores, our cows probably can't spell aluminum.
(The Happy Cow is a California Dairy Board slogan to promote California dairy products - not to say other cow's milk is not good.)
Gregg Owens
-----Original Message-----
From: TechNet [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On Behalf Of Russell Kido
Sent: Friday, September 13, 2013 10:25 AM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Re: [TN] NTC Friday Element Quiz Question
Doug,
Now I know why I am 'happy' and always hungry.
Regards,
Russell Kido
________________________________________
-----Original Message-----
From: TechNet [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On Behalf Of Douglas Pauls
Sent: Friday, September 13, 2013 5:51 AM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Re: [TN] NTC Friday Element Quiz Question
I have this one. The element Dave refers to is another half fractional element (imagine that): Creamium, which lies between lithium and sodium in the periodic table, but has an electron pair configuration similar to aluminum. Creamium was often found in and around bauxite deposits and was considered to be an undesirable material as it often melted at 37.48C, making the bauxite very slippery and difficult to handle, and it induced a mysterious craving for croissants in bauxite miners. When you filter all the bauxite/aluminum out of the Creamium, it does take on a pale yellow hue. Not many people know this (imagine that), but the Butter Cow, made each year at the Iowa State Fair, contains 24% Creamium as it has a higher structural strength than does normal butter.
There are huge natural deposits of Creamium in the upper Midwest in the US (Wisconsin, Iowa, Minnesota), and in Switzerland. One of the foremost researchers of Creamium has been Dr. Fernando Margarine (how ironic) at the University of Wisconsin - Madison. Dr. Margarine found that the most efficient way to separate out the Creamium from the aluminum was to actually feed it to dairy cattle, whose digestive process formed pellets of Creamium in the excrement. His grad students had the job of recovering the Creamium pellets from the cow flop, which is where we get the phrase, this is a shitty job. As noted above, Creamium lends structural strength, and cow flops with a high amount of Creamium are prized at the annual Wisconsin State Cow Chip Throw competition. Dr. Margarine published most of his work in 1793, which was pretty staggering considering that UW-M was not founded till 1848. But as a graduate of that facility, I can tell you that logic does not slow that institution one damn bit. Dr. Margarine came to a sad end, I am sorry to say. He wondered if humans could also refine Creamium as do cattle. He ate enough of it that is colon fused shut and the resulting methane generation cause quite an explosion, killing Dr. Margarine and his research staff instantly. Even today in Wisconsin, you can hear people say that Margarine will kill you, but butter won't.
As a side note, there have been an ugly set of commercials on TV of late, suggesting that California cows are happier than Wisconsin cows, presumably because of differences in Creamium content. It's a vicious lie. California cows are happier than Wisconsin cows because they graze in fields of Marijuana. So they are stoned, not "happy". It's also why California butter leaves you feeling hungrier. Wisconsin cows - home of truth, justice, and true American Dairy products.
Anyway, Dave mentions that countries have gone to war over Creamium, but that is kind of a stretch. Dave refers to the Liechtenstein-Swiss War of 1803. Both countries claimed to have cows that were superior in refining Creamium. Some ugly rhetoric was put forth by both sides, and after several months of lobbing chunks of depleted-Creamium cow flops across the border, the combatants agreed to disagree over a few steins of good beer.
I shall now wait as my esteemed colleague disqualifies me from half a world away.
Doug Pauls
From: "David D. Hillman" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Date: 09/13/2013 05:33 AM
Subject: [TN] NTC Friday Element Quiz Question
Sent by: TechNet <[log in to unmask]>
Hi folks - Here is the Friday Element Quiz Question (coming from sunny Melbourne Australia):
The Question:
This element will float on water. This element looks like aluminum but can
be cut with a butter knife. This element is heated to a liquid phase, poured into rail tank cars where it then solidifies for transport. Once the tank car arrives at its destination, heaters re-liquify this element for removal. Countries have gone to war over this element. The pure form of this element is not found in nature. This element is essential for humans. What element is being described?
The winner of the weekly element quiz is will get the services of Clumpy and Kloumpios for the week.
So far Clumpy and Kloumpios have done the following:
Past Quiz winners/tasks:
Week 1 Dick Krug, Spartan Complex Systems Week 2 Laura Turbini, IRC Week 3 James Head, Crowcon Detection Instruments Limited Week 3 Pat Goodyear, PGE Week 4 Joe Russeau, Precision Analysts Laboratory Week 5 Tom Carroll, Boeing Defense, Space and Security Week 6 Steve Gregory Week 7 Phil Kinner Week 8 Brian Ellis Week 9 James Head, Crowcon Detection Instruments Limited Week 10 Leland Woodall, CSTech Inc.
Week 11 Keith Calhoun, Sopark Corp
Week 12 Matthias Mansfeld, Mansfeld-Elektronik Week 13 Leland Woodall, CSTech Inc.
Week 14 Brian Ellis
Week 15 Tom Carroll, Boeing Defense, Space and Security Week 16 Steve Gregory Week 17 Phil Kinner Week 18 Ian Braddock, MBDA Systems Week 19 Leland Woodall, CSTech Inc.
Week 20 Denny Fritz
Week 21 Amol Kane
Week 21 Dewey Whittaker, Honeywell
Week 21 David Bealer, Watch Fire Signs
Week 22 Phil Kinner
Week 23 Guy Ramsey, RD Circuits
Week 24 Mark Kostinovsky, Schlumberger
- The boys have been working hard and surely deserve some break. I'm fixin' to be nice to the boys and just let them sit on my porch, have a Texas drink, relax and enjoy our weather. This summer's been kinda cold around here: has not even hit 40C (104F) yet.
Week 25 Keith Calhoun, Sopark Corp
- The guys arrived safely, and I sent them to the Erie County Fair. They loved the antique tractor/ live steam exhibit, and are now figuring out what class their John Deere's can run in the Truck and Tractor pull.
They are also having a ball in the beer garden. I'm not sure I will get anything constructive out of them this week but they sure are having fun!
Week 26 Paul Reid, PWB Interconnect Solutions Inc
- Well it's time for Clumpy and Kloumpios to join me for some Canadian wilderness camping in Algonquin Park, Ontario. What we'll do is put the canoe on the van, load up our camping gear, and then we'll head the North East area of Algonquin Park. We'll put in on the Barron River and canoe up to the river to a portage point where Clumpy and Kloumpios will be asked to portage the canoe and gear for about half a kilometer, past some falls, until we put back into the river. What we'll do then is canoe about a mile up stream and setup camp on a beautiful point of land that over looks the Barron Cliffs and has a pine tree every much like The Jack Pine http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Jackpine.jpeg that was painted by Tom Thomson in 1916. I'll start fishing; they will do the cooking and cleaning. We will relax for a few days then we'll head back to Ottawa (given the mosquitoes don't carry us away). Dave - Maybe we can meet you on the Ottawa River some time next week.
Week 27 Greg Munie, IPC
- Since it's getting close to time for the Abbey's grape harvest/wine making I'll get the monks to put them up at the Abbey guest house. From there it's just a short walk to the vineyard. Of course the food at the Abbey may be a little, ah, Spartan, for their tastes. But I can give them enough pruning, weeding and cleanup to do to keep them busy all week.
(Maybe I can even get them to do the water run for the vegetable garden!
They'd probably like driving the old tractor.) And for a special perk they
can have the honor of the company of Benny, the Abbey Golden Retriever!
Week 28 ????
- assisted with ????
Everyone have a safe week!
Dave Hillman
Rockwell Collins
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