I suppose adding the Pac NW and Alaska to Canunkistan would shore up
the contributions of Alberta to the entitlement system gone wild up
in Mackenzie Bro' land. That would extend the time till the
inevitable socialistic "Q" province led bankruptcy but it still
sounds like a suicide pact to me.
"There is no difference between communism and socialism, except in
the means of achieving the same ultimate end: communism proposes to
enslave men by force, socialism - by vote. It is merely the
difference between murder and suicide."
- From "Foreign Policy Drains U.S. of Main Weapons" Ayn Rand
At 03:48 PM 5/25/2008, Bev Christian wrote:
>Joe,
>I expect that since you guys have elected a fair number of
>Republican presidents of late, you may get some hate mail.
>
>Except for your whopping national debt (and Iraq) we would be happy
>to accept you as the 11th through to the 60th province.
>
>I could go on about the parts of the Pacific Northwest, North
>Dakota, Minnesota and Maine that should be part of Canukistan ( so
>we are called by some in your country :). ) By I will end here.
>Regards,
>Bev
>
>----- Original Message -----
>From: TechNet <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask]>
>Sent: Sun May 25 18:20:38 2008
>Subject: [TN] Fwd: Message from the Queen - NTC
>
>To: Undisclosed-Recipient:;
>Sent: 5/25/2008 12:46:42 P.M. Pacific Daylight Time
>Subj: Message from the Queen
>
>
>
>** Important, please read thoroughly! **
>To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty
>Queen Elizabeth II
>
>In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates
>for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice
>of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately.
>Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over
>all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas , which she does
>not fancy).
>Your new Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, will appoint a Governor for America
>without the need for further elections.
>Congress and the Senate will be disbanded.
>A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you
>noticed.
>To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules
>are introduced with immediate effect:
>(You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)
>
>1. Then look up aluminium, and check the pronunciation guide. You will be
>amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it.
>2. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,'
>'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell
>'doughnut' without
>skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the
>suffix '-ise'. Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to
>acceptable levels. (Look up 'vocabulary.')
>------- -----------------
>3. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as
>'like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of
>communication. There is no such thing as US English. We will let
>M*crosoft know on your
>behalf. The M*crosoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the
>reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of -ize.
>-------------------
>4. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.
>-----------------
>5. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or
>therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that
>you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for
>shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone
>or speaking to
>a therapist then you're not ready to shoot grouse.
>----------------------
>6. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more
>dangerous than a vegetable peeler. A permit will be required if you wish to
>carry a vegetable peeler in public.
>----------------------
>7. Al l intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start
>driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go
>metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables.
>Both round abouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense
>of humour.
>--------------------
>8. The Former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been
>calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.
>-------------------
>9. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are
>not real chips, and those things you insist on c alling potato chips are
>properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and
>dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.
>-------------------
>10. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer
>at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer,
>and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as
>Lager. South African beer is also acceptable as they are pound for pound the
>greatest sporting Nation on earth and it can o nly be due to the beer. They
>are also part of British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American
>'beer' brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine,
>so that all can
>be sold without risk of further confusion.
>---------------------
>11. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good
>guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play
>English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English
>dialogue in Four
>Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears
>removed with
>a cheese grater.
>---------------------
>12. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of
>proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough
>will, in time, be
>allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but
>does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full
>kevlar body Armour like a bunch of nancies). Don't try Rugby - the South
>Africans and Kiwis will thrash you, like they regularly thrash us.
>---------------------
>13. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an
>event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of
>America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond
>your borders,
>your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will
>let you face
>the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.
>--------------------
>14. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.
>-----------------
>15. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's
>Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of
>all monies due
>(backdated to 1776).
>---------------
>16. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 pm with proper cups, with saucers,
>and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus
>strawberries (with cream) when in season.
>
>God Save the Queen!
>
>PS:
>Go ahead and share this with your friends in the USA (those with a good
>sense of humour and NOT humor.)
>
>Friday came early this week... ;-)
>
>Cheers,
>Joe
>
>
>
>**************Get trade secrets for amazing burgers. Watch "Cooking with
>Tyler Florence" on AOL Food.
>(http://food.aol.com/tyler-florence?video=4&?NCID=aolfod00030000000002)
>
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