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Subject:
From:
Dwight Mattix <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
TechNet E-Mail Forum <[log in to unmask]>, Dwight Mattix <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Sun, 25 May 2008 17:35:08 -0700
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I suppose adding the Pac NW and Alaska to Canunkistan would shore up 
the contributions of Alberta to the entitlement system gone wild up 
in Mackenzie Bro' land. That would extend the time till the 
inevitable socialistic "Q" province led bankruptcy but it still 
sounds like a suicide pact to me.

"There is no difference between communism and socialism, except in 
the means of achieving the same ultimate end: communism proposes to 
enslave men by force, socialism - by vote. It is merely the 
difference between murder and suicide."

  - From "Foreign Policy Drains U.S. of Main Weapons" Ayn Rand


At 03:48 PM 5/25/2008, Bev Christian wrote:
>Joe,
>I expect that since you guys have elected a fair number of 
>Republican presidents of late,  you may get some hate mail.
>
>Except for your whopping national debt (and Iraq) we would be happy 
>to accept you as the 11th through to the 60th province.
>
>I could go on about the parts of the Pacific Northwest, North 
>Dakota, Minnesota and Maine that should be part of Canukistan ( so 
>we are called by some in your country :). ) By I will end here.
>Regards,
>Bev
>
>----- Original Message -----
>From: TechNet <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask]>
>Sent: Sun May 25 18:20:38 2008
>Subject: [TN] Fwd: Message from the Queen - NTC
>
>To: Undisclosed-Recipient:;
>Sent: 5/25/2008 12:46:42 P.M. Pacific  Daylight Time
>Subj: Message from the Queen
>
>
>
>** Important,  please read  thoroughly! **
>To the citizens of  the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty
>Queen Elizabeth   II
>
>In light  of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates
>for President  of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice
>of the  revocation of your independence, effective immediately.
>Her  Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over
>all  states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas , which she does
>not  fancy).
>Your new  Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, will appoint a Governor for America
>without the  need for further elections.
>Congress  and the Senate will be disbanded.
>A questionnaire may  be circulated next year to determine whether any of you
>noticed.
>To aid in the  transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules
>are introduced  with immediate effect:
>(You  should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)
>
>1. Then look up  aluminium, and check the pronunciation guide. You will be
>amazed at just how  wrongly you have been pronouncing it.
>2. The  letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,'
>'labour'  and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 
>'doughnut' without
>skipping  half the letters,  and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the
>suffix  '-ise'. Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to
>acceptable  levels. (Look up 'vocabulary.')
>-------  -----------------
>3. Using the same  twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as
>'like' and 'you  know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of
>communication. There is no  such thing as US English. We will let 
>M*crosoft know on your
>behalf. The  M*crosoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the
>reinstated  letter 'u' and the elimination of  -ize.
>-------------------
>4. July 4th will no  longer be celebrated as a holiday.
>-----------------
>5. You will learn to  resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or
>therapists. The fact  that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that
>you're not quite ready  to be independent. Guns should only be used for
>shooting grouse. If you can't  sort things out without suing someone 
>or speaking to
>a therapist then you're  not ready to shoot grouse.
>----------------------
>6. Therefore, you  will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more
>dangerous than a  vegetable peeler. A permit will be required if you wish to
>carry a vegetable  peeler in public.
>----------------------
>7. Al l intersections  will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start
>driving on the left side  with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go
>metric with immediate  effect and without the benefit of conversion tables.
>Both  round abouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense
>of  humour.
>--------------------
>8. The Former USA  will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been
>calling gasoline) of  roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.
>-------------------
>9. You will learn to  make real chips. Those things you call French fries are
>not real chips, and  those things you insist on c alling potato chips are
>properly called crisps.  Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and
>dressed not with catsup but  with vinegar.
>-------------------
>10. The cold  tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer
>at all.   Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer,
>and  European brews of  known and accepted provenance will be referred to as
>Lager. South African beer is also acceptable as they are pound for pound the
>greatest sporting Nation on earth and it can o nly be due to the beer. They
>are also part of British Commonwealth - see what it did for them.   American
>'beer' brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, 
>so  that all can
>be sold without risk of further confusion.
>---------------------
>11. Hollywood will be  required occasionally to cast English actors as good
>guys.     Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play
>English  characters.  Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English 
>dialogue in Four
>Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears 
>removed  with
>a cheese grater.
>---------------------
>12. You will cease  playing American football. There is only one kind of
>proper football; you call  it soccer. Those of you brave enough 
>will, in time, be
>allowed to play rugby  (which has some similarities to American football, but
>does not involve  stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full
>kevlar body Armour  like a bunch of nancies). Don't try Rugby - the South
>Africans and Kiwis will  thrash you, like they regularly thrash us.
>---------------------
>13. Further, you will  stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an
>event called the World  Series for a game which is not played outside of
>America. Since only 2.1% of  you are aware there is a world beyond 
>your borders,
>your error is  understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will 
>let you face
>the South  Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.
>--------------------
>14. You must tell us  who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.
>-----------------
>15. An internal  revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's
>Government will be with  you shortly to ensure the acquisition of 
>all monies due
>(backdated to  1776).
>---------------
>16. Daily Tea Time  begins promptly at 4 pm with proper cups, with saucers,
>and never mugs, with  high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus
>strawberries (with  cream)  when in season.
>
>God Save the  Queen!
>
>PS:
>Go ahead and share this with your  friends in the   USA (those with a good
>sense of humour and NOT  humor.)
>
>Friday came early this week... ;-)
>
>Cheers,
>Joe
>
>
>
>**************Get trade secrets for amazing burgers. Watch "Cooking with
>Tyler Florence" on AOL Food.
>(http://food.aol.com/tyler-florence?video=4&?NCID=aolfod00030000000002)
>
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