Enjoy.
Dewey



 
 


>  > > Subject: ABBOTT & COSTELLO
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and too

>> old to  > REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this. For 
>> those of us who  > sometimes get flustered by our computers, please
read on..
>>  >
>>  > If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous 
>> sketch,  > "Who's on First?" might have turned out something like
this:
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT  >  >  > ABBOTT: 
>> Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and  I'm 
>> thinking  > about buying a computer.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Mac?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Your computer?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Mac?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: What about Windows?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the
windows?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write

>> > proposals track expenses and run my business. What do you have?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Office.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: I just did.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: You just did what?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Recommend something.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: You recommended something?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Yes.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: For my office?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Yes.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Office.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just 
>> say I'm  > sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What
do I need?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Word.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: What word?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Word in Office.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you! don't start 
>> with some  > straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You 
>> have anything I  > can track my money with?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Money.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Money.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Money.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: One copy.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > (A few days later)
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?
>>  >
>>  >
>>  > ABBOTT: Click on "START".......
>  > >
>  >

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